Home \
Squackle Broadcasting
Company \ Commercial: Rose Hill Retirement Home
Love is in the Air plays softly in the background.
An old man with a voice that sounds like a vagina being squeezed combined
with chalk being scrubbed hard against a blackboard is standing is front
of a broken down building with boards nailed over the windows. The background
music fails to stifle the sounds of people inside screaming bloody murder.
Old man: (Waving his arms) Hi there I'm Jake Morgan from the Rose Hill Retirement
Villa.
Camera pans to the right with a whoosh sound really fast to switch scenes.
Old man: I'm here with one of our experiments to see what he thinks of this
place!
Camera slowly pans over to a really skinny guy in a bath robe as the volume
of the background music mysteriously increases.
Bath robe guy: (Horribly dubbed with a deep voice) I like it here, all the
people are nice to me. I encourage all of you to come join us. (His lips
move silently for eight more seconds)
Old man: Kind words...from a kind ma-ACHOO!!
The old man sneezes loudly on the bath robe guy's face, blowing snot everywhere.
The old man calmly walks to the left and the camera clumsily cuts to two
guys having sex in a shower. Several black and white lines float across the
top of the screen and a weird zapping noise is heard which sends the camera
back to the old guy.
Old guy: So there you have it (he flashes his biggest smile)
Screen freezes and a telephone number appears at the bottom of the screen
while the Micro Machines guy reads it off. It then cuts to the old guy swinging
on a porch swing. A low battery light blinks at the bottom right of the screen.
Old guy: And tell em JAKE sent y-(Goes black)
(end)
Home \
Squackle Broadcasting
Company \ Commercial: Rose Hill Retirement Home
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