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This is a Shitlock Holmes adventure
Holmes's is beating Watchman, his assistant, in a game of twister. They are
in there office. Watchman falls ontop of Holmes...It looks really gay. Just
then the secretary walks into the office.
Secretary : Uh...ok?
Holmes : Well what is it bitch?
Secretary : You got a call, some teenager lost his X Box. He wants you and
your gay lover to help.
Holmes : Thanks slut, next time bring one of your thousands of boyfriends
to help us solve the case.
Secretary flips him off and slams the door of his office. Holmes gets up,
kicks Watchman off the mat and rolls it up. Watchman rols back his sleeve
reveling his arm full of watches...what the fuck?
Holmes : Well Watchman, we got a case finally.
Watchman : Ye-
Holmes : Shut up and get me my coat.
Watchman gets the coat and they walk out. They arrive at Jimmy P.'s house
an hour late because Watchman is stupid and can't drive for shit. He hit
like 5 grandma's and 2 stop signs. Anyways, Jimmy P. opens the door when
he hears the crash outside his house. What a surprise, Watchman drove into
the side of the house.
Jimmy : WHAT THE FUCKKKK!!!!!!!!
Watchman : So-
Holmes : Shut up Watchman
Jimmy : WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR?
Holmes : Sorry, anyways where's the crime scene?
Jimmy : DON'T ANYWAYS ME, YOU CRASHED RIGHT INTO MY FUCKIN HOUSE, MY X BOX
ISN'T WORTH THE ASS BEATIN' I'M GETTIN FROM MY GRANDMA WHEN SHE COMES HOME
FROM HER WALK!
Holmes looks at Watchman and back at Jimmy.
Holmes : Um did she have belbottom pants and a pink cane and a purple pimpin'
hat?
Jimmy : Yea, why?
Holmes and Watchman : ....
Holmes : um...yeah, she's probablly laying on the street tired or
somethin...we'll see her when she gets back
Watchman runs to the car and quickly pulls off the Purple Pimp hat thats
covered in blood off the bumper and throws it into the neighbor's yard.
Holmes : Anyways...about that crime scene...
Jimmy : Oh yeah it's over here...
Jimmy leads them inside to his house, they hop over the car thats in the
middle of the dining room and they make there way into his room. Holmes and
Watchman survey the scene.
Holmes : The X Box is right here...are you stupid?
Jimmy : No, the other X Box...
Holmes : You have 2 X Boxs?
Jimmy : No
Watchman : it's 3:01 PM EST
Holmes is confused...
Jimmy : It's the Box that the X Box came in, thats the real X Box because
with out it, you can't get the X Box...
Holmes : Umm...ok??
Jimmy : It's stolen...
Holmes : And who gives a shit?
Jimmy : It's stolen
Watchman goes to the car and pulls out a bag and heads to the bathroom. He
dumps the bag into the bathtub and it's full of...???...WATCHES? WHAT THE
FUCK? He takes off his clothes and jumps in. Jimmy heres the noise and goes
to the bathroom.
Jimmy : what the fuck???
Watchman : it's 3:30 PM EST!!!!!! WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!
Jimmy goes to his room and pulls out his baseball bat and walks back into
the bathroom. He starts smashing the watches in the bathtub!
Jimmy : WHAT TIME IS IT NOW MOTHA FUCKA!
Watchman gets pissed and tackles Jimmy..they get into a tough game of thumb
war... WHAT THE FUCK? Holmes walks in and see's Watchman and Jimmy thumb
wrestling.
Holmes : Watchman, grab your watches and lets go.
Jimmy : But what about my X Box????
Holmes : Fuck your X Box, besides your grandma had it when she was walkin
down the street to your house right before we...um nevermind...
Holmes walks quickly over to the car and Jimmy follows.
Jimmy : Right before what?
Suddenly, jimmy looks over to the car and see's a X Boxs' Box flattened against
the hood of the car covered with blood. Watchman grabs his sack full of watches,
forgets his clothes and hops in the car, Holmes follows.
Jimmy : YOU ASSHOLES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Watchman drives off crashing into garbage cans n' stuff...watches are flying
out the windows of the car. They make there way back to there office and
they crash into the building, even though Watchman is butt naked and his
arms and legs are covered with watches. The End.
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