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Compactor
Prologue
I have a three day weekend coming up after finals. I'm going to play video
games the whole time. It will be so relaxing. I won't even have to tink!
I can just sit in my room and stare at the TV. I can't wait. Actually, that
will probably never happen. So...anyway, you can read this story I wrote,
if you want.
Chapter 1
"Yes, I have finally done it! I have constructed a trash compactor so large,
that I will be able to crush the earth with it!" thought Ted, the repair
guy from Venus. Ted was a simple man. Well, he was. One day a couple very
rich peoplecame and told him to repair all 50 billion of their trash compactors.
Ted just snapped. He was used to maybe one or two jobs a month, but this
was too much. Ted took the trash compactors, and used them to create a giant
trash compactor big enough to crush the Earth.
"Why the Earth, and not Venus?" you might ask? Well, one day he decided that
the Earth was much too big, and it would be more efficient as a small cube.
He would do the same to Venus, after.
Chapter 2
Bill was walking down the street having a normal day on Earth. He was going
to buy a newspaper, then go home and read a book by the fire. The newspaper
was for kindling. Suddenly, there was an eclipse. Bob looked up and saw the
outline of something very huge that was blocking the sun. It looked a bit
like the trash compactor in his kitchen that he used all the "pets" his kids
brought home, only much bigger, obviously. Bill could hear a voice coming
from the giant thing. This is what it said:
"Hello everyone. This is Ted the repair guy and yes, I am flying a giant
trash compactor. Do not be alarmed! I come in peace....well, no, actually
I don't. I'm going to crush your planet into a small cube. I'm sorry if this
has caused any inconvenience."
Bill shrugged and said, "I never thought you could do that with a trash
compactor...maybe I'll crush the moon sometime." And with that, Ted crushed
the Earth and killed everything on it.
Chapter 3
The people of Venus were talking. They were talking about launching nuclear
missles at the giant trash compactor. The problem was that they talked too
much and Ted crushed them all before they had a chance to stop talking.
Epilogue
This story had one point. Never use trash compactors. You just heard how
dangerous they are, so why use them at all? Trash compactors are just plain
bad, and that goes for garbaged disposals too. Those things slice and dice
things to peices. I can only imagine how many people die each year from the
use of garbage disposals. Both of these things are dangerous, and you should
avoid them at all costs
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